What a Weekend!

SheSpeaks.

I miss all my new friends so much already. It’s unbelievable what a bond I feel with those women. 

Usually after very social events I get a little weird. I actually thought a lot about it before I came here, expecting that I would need to figure out how to cope. I also pre-decided (a Lysa T. term) that I would write about exactly what I felt and try to put it into words as it was happening. But you know what? God’s peace is so heavy upon me. I could cry just sitting right here in the Charlotte Airport. 

Maybe I’ll feel weird tomorrow, but today I feel more alive that I have in quite some time. No uncertainty about what the other women thought of me. No fear that I said the wrong things or did something offensive. No worry over how I am going to implement all the truth I soaked up this weekend. This is how I should live all the time. 

This morning I was wide awake at 4:30am. It’s not the time difference, since it was actually only 1:30am in Portland, but I was really anxious again. My stomach hurt and I tried desperately to sleep it off. To no avail, I twisted and turned while my stomach twisted and churned until about 5:30am when I finally decided to get on with my day. After hearing my new friend Lee Anne give her devotional yesterday, I decided to take her advice about how to fight worry. 

1- Praise God.

I won’t tell you all of her steps yet, as it is her story, her insight. But this first step was perfect. Actively telling God how grateful I was, how He is good no matter what I am worried about, that He knows where I will be in 30 days, that He is in total control, and that He loves me. 

Then, I downloaded the First 5 app from Proverbs 31 ministries and watched the video for today. 

Holy freaking moly. 

I met those ladies the last two days! Whitney and Leah… I got to listen to their wisdom in person! When I got a chance each day, I tracked them down and told them thank you. They were so sweet, so gracious, and almost shocked to see that God’s working through them was working in me. I feel like they are my friends already and I was so glad to glean even more of their biblical wisdom and insight again this morning. 

I may still feel weird later today, but I’m not worried about if that happens. I’m SO looking forward to seeing my sister soon & exploring Boston for the first time. I am so undeserving of these good gifts, of this incredible peace. God has blown me away once again, more that ever and I am going to revel in it for as long as I can.